The Funnies: 10 Ways Mitt Romney Can Blow the Election
The presidential campaign is in full swing and Mitt Romney is ready to fight. He’d better be careful, though, because there’s a fine line between winning over voters and alienating them altogether.
Here are 10 ways Romney can blow the election:
1. Give a speech in which he claims 47% of Americans are “dependent” and “entitled.”
2. Run on a platform that gas prices need to be higher.
3. Debate Clint Eastwood’s “Invisible Obama.”
4. Have Anne Romney challenge Michelle Obama to a Jell-O wrestling match. (She’ll lose. Have you seen Michelle’s arms?)
5. Drive to the debates with the family dog strapped to the top of his car.
6. Tell business owners how much fun it is to fire people.
7. Get a ringing endorsement from Amanda Bynes.
8. Reveal that due to a clerical error, his running mate turned out to be Paul Ryan when he meant it to be Nolan Ryan.
9. Use the phrase “Obama yo mama” at least once.
10. Make out with Anne Romney in public. (No one wants to see that.)