Sioux Falls Man Shocked No One Wants to Buy His TV
A man with a TV for sale on social media is completely shocked that no one wants to buy it while thousands online laugh at his cluelessness.
Tom Toole is selling a 19-inch White Westinghouse brand television on Facebook. After two months on the marketplace and other sale groups he hasn’t had a single message of interest.
“Not one single person has sent me a message or commented that they’re interested,” he said. “There have been a bunch of people who have tagged friends in a comment and said nothing else. And all the likes are either the laughing face or the anger face. It almost seems like they’re making fun of me.”
One of the commenters, 20 year-old Sheeluh Anderson confirmed Toole’s suspicion.
“Yes, we’re totally laughing at him,” she said. “And quit laughing, yes, that’s how my stupid mom spelled my name.”
As for the television, it has a 19-inch color screen, a remote control, and only has one coaxial cable connection in the back. It’s older than this year’s college freshmen class.
“It still works fine,” Toole said. “I’m only getting rid of it because I bought a sweet 60-inch 4K TV with Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, Wi-Fi, and a bunch of others stuff I don’t even know how to run. The picture is so awesome I can’t believe it!”
As for his old TV, poor clueless Toole is still holding out hope for a buyer.
“I’m only asking $20 for it. It’s gotta be worth that to someone,” he said.
Meanwhile, the White Westinghouse sits in Toole’s garage waiting for a home. Something that has been happening more and more in the area, according to Mark Morgan, a local electronics repair technician.
“People are so stupid,” he said. “These old TV’s from the 90’s that work but are totally obsolete are everywhere. And the people who have them think that since they paid $200 for it in 1998 that they should be able to get something for it. They’re idiots! I have a rock in my landscaping that’s worth five cents and that’s worth more than this guy’s TV.”
TV’s aren’t the only thing showing up in Morgan’s shop, where he makes a lavish living mostly by replacing iPhone screens for clutzy teens and twenty somethings.
“I had this woman come in last week with a computer card that she found in a drawer and didn’t know what it was and thought she could sell it,” he said. “It was a dial-up modem. It was more worthless than that guy’s TV. At least the TV would hold down a table cloth on a windy day. When I told her I would actually charge her $10 to take it to the electronics recycling, because it isn’t free for me, she blew her top and walked out.”
Morgan suggests taking old and busted or old and not busted TV’s to the Household Hazardous Waste Facility for free recycling at 1017 East Chambers Street in Sioux Falls.
He also suggests that people “get a clue.”
This is satire. It’s not real, obviously (except for the part about electronics recycling, that’s real). But it was fun to write. ~Andy
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