When we were kids, life was a simple as eating a hot dog. And enjoying a hot dog was easy. There were no worries. all you needed was a weiner, a bun and some ketchup and mustard. That was it! Then munch it down.

However, as we get older, life gets more complicated. Now we even face the proper way to eat a hot dog. Yes, there are do's and don't's for proper, let's call it, "hot dog etiquette".

First of all, I have no idea why people get so bent out of shape about putting ketchup on a hot dog. Somewhere along the way, people decided that it's wrong to use that condiment on hot dogs.

Personally, I don't use ketchup on mine anyway. Now, my idea of a hot dog, is to add dill relish, chopped onion, ground black pepper, mustard and jalapeno pepper slices.

Now with all that said, there's more to it than what to use. It's the order in which you put it on. Always add the liquid items first, then the chunky stuff, and then the spices last.

What difference does the order make? Well if you would have seen me at the last ball game you would know. I made the mistake of adding the mustard last. And when I went to take a bite, the piled high chunky toppings fell into my lap bringing all the mustard with it. The massive yellow spots on my white pants kept me confined to my seat all night. It would have been embarrassing to be seen by the other fans.

I read it's wrong to use utensils and you should only eat with your hands. I disagree. I love sloppy Joe on hot dogs, and that requires tools while eating. I refuse to leave meat droppings go uneaten and I'm not using my fingers.

I say, forget the napkins. I like licking condiments off my fingers. However, licking the paper dish they serve your hot dog in, I think is tacky. And I want to implement a rule: If you are 18 or younger, go ahead and feel free to put ketchup on your hot dog!


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