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Can I Have Some Ketchup for My Steak Please

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So the other day I’m out enjoying lunch with a friend at a local steakhouse when I ask the waitress if she could bring me some ketchup for my steak – OMG!!! You would’ve thought I committed a crime.

Not only did I get an earful from our waitress, but my friend decided he need to chime in and chastise me in front of everyone as well. They both then began lecturing me on my choice of “steak sauce.”

“Oh my God! You can’t put ketchup on steak. What, were you raised on a farm?” Why, yes – yes I was!!! Growing up, we had two choices – ketchup or ketchup. My dad liked putting ketchup on his steak so that’s the way I was raised.

So then they say, “My Goodness, at least use Heinz 57 or A-1 sauce” Sorry, but in my humble opinion they’re both basically ketchup with a tinge of horseradish. Just give me a bottle of plain Heinz ketchup and leave me be.

This is not the first time I’ve been questioned about my choice of steak sauce. I’ve got a couple of friends who say that if your steak is prepared properly, you should NEVER have to put ANYTHING on your steak. Maybe a little salt, but that’s it.

Ask anyone who was raised on a farm though and I’ll bet you the majority of them grew up putting ketchup on their steak. In fact, even to this day I still put ketchup on not only steak, but also pork, chicken, eggs and potatoes. YUMMERS!!!

My friend tried to tell me that ketchup should only be used on hamburger – but ONLY if there isn’t a fresh slice of tomato available. Really? Mr. ketchup snob!!! So I ask you, “What’s hamburger? GROUND UP STEAK!!!”

Also, why is putting blue cheese crumbles on a steak considered proper but not ketchup? You’re gonna tell me something that smells like toe-jam on a hot summer day tastes better than squished tomatoes? Sorry, not buying it.

So, to make a long story short, how did our lunch end – by me putting ketchup on my steak AND my friend’s steak when he excused himself to go to the bathroom. What’s funny though is after throwing a fit, he actually admitted it didn’t taste too bad.

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